Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Omg, this is bad, my emoness coming back again. Maybe not really emo but dunno, dun feel good about it. Isit the marketing assignment that's driving me crazy? i still dunno what products have favourable PLC and which doesnt and HOW TO WRITE??? or isit frisbee? that i want to improve so much.. it has been months, i hope to see greater improvements in myself after putting much effort and much sacrifices are made- my super tanned skin and super ugly legs and lotsa blueblacks after every week. Can i improve much more? i want to! i DESIRE to! or isit something else that adds on to my 'not so good' feeling. it surprises me how people changes. sometimes, you just couldn't figure it out what has happened or what's going on right now. Maybe people didn't change? has been like that all the while? just that we dun really notice it. Some like changes, perhaps wanna try something new and things changes after some time....
sometimes i hope for a simple life, but sometimes u just hope that it is not too simple cause it bores you. you hope for some spices in your life but it always turn out the wrong spark for you. i'm quite tired of it. i'm still in confusion for some things and till today i've yet to figure it out. To say the truth, i'm actually quite bothered about it though i always say i'm not. i hate myself to be like that and i hope similar things dun happen to me again and again and again. Sometimes i wanna cry. if you ask me why i wanna.. i really dunno the answer. Sometimes i hope to be dependent but there's no one.....Others wanna explain my feelings in a very simple manner but i know it's not that simple, it's a much more complex feeling. it's hard to explain. i feel that i'm quite a failure somehow.....i'm not brave afterall.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009